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Winnipeg Jets Sign Mennonite Senior to Bring Some Youth to the Team

WINNIPEG, MB The Winnipeg Jets have signed Mr. Plett, 84, of Bethlehem Place to bring some much needed youth and agility to their aging lineup. “I lot of people can’t figure out what’s gone wrong this year,” said head coach Scott Arniel, “but I knew he had to get younger. Thankfully, the city of Winnipeg has a treasure trove of seniors who played in the EM Cup back in the 60s to choose from.” Mr. Plett will be instantly given the left winger spo…
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[SATIRE] The Unger Review broke the news in on Tuesday, January 20, 2026.
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