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UnitedHealthcare Announces Bold New Plan To Cover Nothing

Summary by That Oregon Life
MINNETONKA, MN — In a daring move sure to disrupt the healthcare industry, UnitedHealthcare unveiled its most ambitious policy overhaul yet: a bold new plan to cover absolutely nothing. “We’ve listened to our customers,” said CEO Clive E. Denial, during a press conference held in a padded room lined with unpaid claim forms. “And what we heard loud and clear is: ‘We’re confused, exhausted, and financially ruined.’ So we thought—why not streamline…
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That Oregon LifeThat Oregon Life

UnitedHealthcare Announces Bold New Plan To Cover Nothing

MINNETONKA, MN — In a daring move sure to disrupt the healthcare industry, UnitedHealthcare unveiled its most ambitious policy overhaul yet: a bold new plan to cover absolutely nothing. “We’ve listened to our customers,” said CEO Clive E. Denial, during a press conference held in a padded room lined with unpaid claim forms. “And what we heard loud and clear is: ‘We’re confused, exhausted, and financially ruined.’ So we thought—why not streamline…

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That Oregon Life broke the news in on Wednesday, April 2, 2025.
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