US EditionStudy shows how domestic abusers forge 'trauma bonds' before violence begins
Researchers found abusers use cycles of affection and cruelty to create trauma bonds that mimic addiction, holding victims psychologically before physical violence begins, study says.
- On Oct 15 2025, University of Cambridge criminologist Mags Lesiak published a study showing male abusers intentionally manufacture trauma bonds before visible violence through grooming and manipulation.
- Lesiak says abusers exploit shared trauma to create control by co-opting narratives to justify abuse and foster dependency, with study participants describing the bond as addictive.
- Lesiak described a consistent pattern of love‑bombing followed by cruelty, noting abusers use staged vulnerability to build false intimacy and employ intermittent rewards, fitting grooming patterns.
- Recorded offences and surveys show coercive control at scale, with police recording 45,310 offences and 6.6% of women experiencing domestic abuse, despite participants often living apart from abusers.
- To improve detection, Mags Lesiak urges training for police and frontline workers to recognise non-physical entrapment like the "two-faced soulmate" and cautions organisations against blaming victims.
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35 Articles
How domestic abusers use emotional bonding to control their victims – new study
AYO Productions/ShutterstockAt first, it looks like love. He’s charming. Always generous, always attentive. He remembers your coffee order, listens to your stories, seems to share your pain. He tells you that you’re the only one who understands him. But as the relationship deepens, the warmth starts to fade. He becomes distant, defensive, unpredictable. You try harder to reconnect. You think: maybe it’s me. This pattern of affection followed by …
Study provides new framework for understanding domestic violence
Before going on to commit violence, domestic abusers use a mix of intense affection and emotional cruelty, combined with tales of their own childhood trauma, to generate a deep psychological hold that can feel like an "addiction" according to some victims.
Study shows how domestic abusers forge 'trauma bonds' before violence begins
Before going on to commit violence, domestic abusers use a mix of intense affection and emotional cruelty, combined with tales of their own childhood trauma, to generate a deep psychological hold that can feel like an "addiction" according to some victims.
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