Asking Eric: Suburban Family Holds ‘Intervention’ for City-Loving Child
The columnist says the parents may be acting on anxieties and unmet expectations, not just concern about the adult child’s choices.
- Advice columnist R. Eric Thomas responded to two readers struggling with personal boundaries, offering guidance on navigating unwanted social pressure from family and a ballroom dance partner.
- One ballroom dancer reported feeling uncomfortable with a partner who tells corny jokes before dancing, finding the humor 'not funny, or even clever.'
- Thomas suggested the dancer set firm boundaries by saying: 'I'm not a dad joke person and it takes me out of the experience. Next time, can we just enjoy dancing together?'
- Another reader described a tense intervention where family members living near Indianapolis criticized their Chicago lifestyle, including their facial hair and use of gender-neutral pronouns.
- Thomas encouraged the reader to identify the 'note behind the note,' suggesting parental anxiety might stem from deeper unmet expectations rather than surface lifestyle complaints.
12 Articles
12 Articles
Asking Eric: My family held an intervention to change my big-city ways
They ambushed me with their evidence that I'm "losing myself."
Asking Eric: Five years into living in Chicago and my parents say I'm 'losing myself'
Dear Eric: After college, I moved to Chicago even though my parents wanted me to move back home. They live in a suburb outside of Indianapolis. It’s fine for them but I wanted better career prospects and a social life that was different from what I had growing up.
Asking Eric: Suburban family holds ‘intervention’ for city-loving child
Advice columnist R. Eric Thomas answers his readers' questions in this September 23, 2026 edition of Asking Eric.
Asking Eric: I’m happy in Chicago
Dear Eric: After college, I moved to Chicago even though my parents wanted me to move back home. They live in a suburb outside of Indianapolis. It’s fine for them but I wanted better career prospects and a social life that was different from what I had growing up. I’m really happy here. It’s been five years and I don’t see any reason to move back.
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- 55% of the sources are Center
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