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Asking Eric: Cheeky Middle-Aged Couple, with 3 Past Marriages, 2 Homes, Are Still Asking for Wedding Gifts

A letter to advice columnist R. Eric Thomas describes a couple in their mid-to-late 60s who own longtime single-family homes and registered for expensive kitchenware, lamps, and furnishings, effectively asking others to replace what they already have.
When asked why, the couple said their existing items are older and they want new household goods as they start out together, and the letter-writer calls it `chutzpah` after discussing the registry's inappropriateness.
The letter-writer says the couple have gone off the rails by asking others to re-equip and re-furnish their home, and she would be uncomfortable using their new dishware and plans to cool the relationship after telling her husband how hurt she is.
R. Eric Thomas, advice columnist, advises communicating needs vulnerably to avoid resentments, recommends asking the husband’s sister about family omissions, and reminds no one must buy a gift.
Looking at the bigger picture, Thomas suggests separating incidents and considering communication mix-ups may ease addressing issues between the letter-writer and her social circle, adding it's not a crime to have `chutzpah` if friends willingly replace items.

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