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Donald Trump · United StatesFIFA (the international criminal and money laundering organization) announced, today, that it awarded United States President Donald Trump the official 2025 Club World Cup Champion.
“Glorious leader President Trump defeated the merciless communist team from Paris,” stated the communique sent out to the press. "All hail the achievements of the President.”Sources say that President Trump had the Club World Cup trophy taken to the White House to b…Read Article
FIFA Announces President Trump As 2025 Club World Cup Champion

Donald Trump · WashingtonWASHINGTON - Speaking with journalists at a $500 a ticket press conference, President Donald Trump announced that the Cascadia bio-region would be hit with a 30% tariff.
“The numbers are very bad, very bad,” stated President Trump. “You will see them later. They rob us. It’s disgusting. There’s still room for a deal. They will make a deal or we will raise tariffs again.”Sources say that President Trump was told that this is actually already a p…Read Article
President Trump Announces 30% Tariff On Cascadia

Artificial Intelligence · United StatesINTERNET - An ebullient and ecstatic Alexi Lalas reportedly screamed at the microphone prompt of an AI chat bot to find the ethnicity and birthplace of the USMNT starting lineup in order to figure out exactly who he would blame for their loss to Mexico.
“I NEED CONTENT,” stated Lalas into an AI chatbot. “TELL ME THE COUNTRY OF ORIGIN AND GENETIC MAKEUP OF THESE BUMS.”Sources say that Lalas reportedly took to his social media accounts to schedul…Read Article
Ebullient Alexi Lalas Screams At AI Chat Bot To Find Ethnicity And Birthplace Of Starting USMNT Lineup In Order To Figure Out Who To Criticize
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